How I discovered the key to communication and connection in tough "make or break" moments.
Conflict and hostility was destroying my marriage.
The first time I tried to stand up for myself at work, I ended up in the bathroom in tears. I was 22 years old, presenting a training for a group of middle-aged men.
Five years later the same thing was happening at home when I shared a concern or complaint with my husband.
We saw 5 marriage counselors in the first 7 years of our marriage. Yet we still fell into the same dead-end conflict patterns every time I tried to share my feelings & concerns.
I couldn't take one more hostile response to a simple request. I was ready to walk away from my marriage.
When I finally stopped trying to fix my approach and started embracing my imperfections and strengths, I discovered that it was never about saying the right thing in the right way or trying to make a request he couldn't refuse.
Clear & confident communication starts with knowing your needs and trusting that your partner will receive them as well as they can. Then taking whatever happens next and dealing with it - channeling all that energy you have been putting into saying the right thing and refocusing on hearing and understanding each other.
the truth about tough relationships
You have the power to set a new tone in your relationship...
...it only takes one person to break unhealthy conflict patterns and create peace and connection amidst your differences.
what we do
Three steps to revolutionize your relationships.
Slow down and get specific about what you want and need.
A clear picture of the life you are creating allows you to confidently steer a conversation back on track when your partner withdraws or pushes back.
Know your partner
When you start seeing your partner as a whole person, you no longer get stuck in the victim/villain stories that create dead-end conflict patterns.
Without the distraction of unhelpful assumptions, you can clearly see a path forward toward a win/win solution.
Commit to Keep Talking
As you learn and practice the Keep Talking Framework™ tough conversations become more productive and less tenuous.
Rather than stressing about saying the right things in the right way, you are fully present in every conversation.
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